A weak Evangelist

Since I have moved to Scotland I have disclosed to a few people here that I am hesitant over taking a stranger through the sinner's prayer. I have no memory of ever taking a friend through the sinner's prayer either.
As someone who teaches on this subject I have a mixed feeling about admitting this. I have concerned people who perhaps understand this as me being unsure about my belief in Jesus as my one and only saviour- I am not; or that I think anyone who leads people to faith in this way is somehow wrong or forced- I do not. I have also concerned myself that I am perhaps unable to fulfil my job as an Evangelist.
However, there are a several hurdles in my culture and personal worldview that mean that I want to be very careful when I invite someone to 'give their life to Jesus' -with me, and repeating my words.

Firstly, many of the opportunities I reflect on as moments to whip out the 'give your life to Jesus!' line have been when my closest friends have been low, they have come to me, full of emotion and brokenness. They have been strangers on the edge of their world, fearing for their life and a hope for the future. Sometimes hardly able to choose a loaf of bread let alone make the biggest decision of their life. They have been people who are already on a journey with God, already wrestling with their creator on personal and gigantic issues.

Secondly, I often have an intense desire to see people liberated from their brokenness, to a personal relationship with Jesus, so I rush toward them, with my visual aid or love gift, full of the 'love of God' and all I believe He has for them on this exact occasion, and they are overwhelmed, stunned or alienated. I have not met them where they are, in what they are facing in their lives.

So I have resolved that pulling out the sinner's prayer has its time and occasion and probably needed more than I often recognise, but I desire to take someone through this because I have first observed what the Lord is saying to this person, what this decision and step will mean for them and that they will know who can support them as they join the most far-reaching, weird and wonderful family of this earth.

For this reason I consider myself a weak Evangelist because I don't believe I am currently walking closely enough to the Holy Spirit to minister to people. Whilst evangelism is part of how I worship God, acquainting souls with their King is not something I honestly believe I can do. Perhaps this is impossible for any of us but if it is possible it will only come out of being completely aligned to God's heart, God's voice and the stillest, smallest voice. It will never be down to how much I want it, or how many times I rehearse my speech.

No rain in Glasgow

 

Today was our first venture onto the streets of Glasgow. It was forecast rain but did not rain. But as we made ourselves available in the eventuality of rain we invited people to interact in a different way with the community of faith. I felt it was important to offer a different message to the others being spoken and discussed by Christians and other groups out today. We wanted Glasgow to know that they are loved and either through a free hug of just the invitation for someone to be heard. The general response was of amusement, people were flattered, some were quite moved and grateful. Billy sculpted some balloons for passers-by. Instead of feeling frustrated he demonstrated continued optimism and enthusiasm to bless people. My new friend has shown me the fun in free hugs which is a gift and I look forward to seeing God share much more with the people of Scotland through him in the near future.

' Have you got enough umbrellas there?'

Preparing for an 'outreach' can present it's own opportunities for inviting people to think about life differently. My bizarre behaviour scrabbling amongst several hundred umbrellas for the choiciest choices of polyester, steel and plastic stirred curiosity in one of the staff in a popular high-street shop.
He asked me if I had enough umbrellas, I told him about what I was doing and why. He was such a warm fella, very helpful and I enjoyed his humour and amusement at my expense.
As I went through the till I amused the shop assistant too. He cropped up again and informed me of his own experience of Church. That he used to go to Church but in recent years he felt the new minister was not as down to earth and relatable as the previous one. He was so honest with me. I felt so privileged to hear his story, it has given me anticipation for the give-away tomorrow.